The Hunter of Conflict
“I am the Hunter of Conflict. Though I may seem fierce and intractable, I hesitate to draw my sword except in defence. Rather, I seek peaceful ways to help you resolve opposition in your life, and whilst I may use powerful energies of conflict to fuel myself, I do not seek to gain victory over others through violence or aggression. I exist to seek out the sources of your inner conflicts, and find ways to heal and restore you to a state of wholeness.”
Conflict, though we seldom choose it willingly, is deeply embedded within our collective psyche today, just as it was for our forebears. Now, as then, we see conflicts over territory, possessions and ideas, and often these can lead to the destruction of values and ways of life. The Hunter of Conflict stands beside us to seek out a path of healing, and counsels us to be peaceful – to lay aside old grievances and inner debate. In our own lives we may often feel at war with ourselves, in turmoil over decisions we must make. Letting go of such anxieties clears our mind, restoring balance and inner peace.
Struggle; Determination; Resolution; Finding better ways; Restoring balance; Facing obstacles; Courage; Energy; Healing; Harnessing strength to achieve peace.
My personal interpretation for me at this time…
(Firstly I have been away for a bit due to health issues - my wrist pain has been back with a vengeance and you can imagine what that does for typing ;) but I have been babying it for a while now and I really felt drawn to my cards and honestly I have missed them…and missed writing.)
On to the card…conflict. Great *rolls eyes sarcastically* can’t get away from that word these days…seems like the whole world is embroiled in a conflict and even regular people seem more…prone to anger these days but this card is not drawn for the world, it was drawn for me and I’m very good at stalling!
Well the only conflict in my life is within me - which, surprisingly perhaps, I am grateful for as I have had enough outside conflict to last a lifetime lol. We are also currently into a mercury retrograde which brings up even more conflict than normal…but that is not always a bad thing - sometimes you need conflict otherwise nothing would change. Conflict can be good or it can be disastrously bad…as with all things in life there is a balance. Dam…there is that word again…Balance….B-A-L-A-N-C-E trips me up every time…which is ironic in itself as you need balance to walk.
So where is my conflict…well as with everyone else I have my own inner stuff to work out but this card is not talking to me about my shadows this time...no that isn’t it at all. So what is it…I’m going to drink my herbal tea (Apple & Blueberry if you’re curious) and ponder for a minute…
Ok, I'm back, so the biggest conflict in me that waves their hands up for attention is the battle between where I am and where I want to be….or who I am and who I want to be…I feel stuck. I can see why it is coming up now - middle of January - new month, new year…I have plenty of goals and one of the most depressing things is some of these goals have been kicking around in my diaries for years…year in and year out. Simple stuff - routine stuff, like getting into a better daily routine - bed at an earlier time so I get enough rest to be up early, doing a ritual circle each week, writing in my journal once a day (which in all fairness is one I do apart from when my nemesis…I mean wrist is acting up), setting aside time to do studying for my 2nd Degree in Wicca (Nope haven’t changed my path - still not wiccan but the teaching is a valuable tool and it is an eclectic college so it’s all good) and handing in these assignment regularly, keeping up with my online things but not neglecting my offline life or the people in it. Doing my yoga on a regular basis and fitting my weekly exercise in on top of that…
The thing is I go full force ahead and then get ill when I over-do…then I under-do…which leads to apathy and a lack of motivation which then leads to me being angry at myself and there for getting ill again through the sheer shit-load of negativity I subject myself to because I have “failed” my own goals.
I guess I am like anyone else…we have grand ideas and a big burst of motivation but then it wanes…till it waxes again. Being female I wax and wane with the moon anyway and maybe that is a good thing. Instead of burning through all that enthusiasm in one week or one day I need to retain it, contain it and use it in doses so I don’t burn out. I need to learn how to go slowly without stopping.
Dam I guess life really is like a tightrope - stay still you fall, go to fast you fall…I guess I am going to have to learn balance, learn to keep up my motivation - a magickal memo board will be in the works for that - which I will blog about another day! I also need to make sure I give myself mini-breaks so I don’t burn out.
Well I guess I have a plan...! Well if there is one thing that a mercury retrograde is good for is for readjusting, removing blockages, reaffirming plans…etc.
*as always the card image and meanings are taken from “The Shamans Oracle”